Vindicated

I feel frustrated that we have to deal with the demons that other people created to serve their self vested interests. We have to fight off and carry the torch because we want to prove them otherwise. That moment that we waited came and all our efforts paid off. Our actions set the motion to show them how distorted their views about us just because they decided to keep up with the demons instead of fighting it off.

Vindicated we may have but I feel frustrated of the lost time and opportunities because we were judged than supported. I may have forgiven them especially those people who are directly involved but I am still reeling from all the consequences of their actions. I do not wish them to suffer but  they should have at least their own share of the consequences of their actions.

frustrating.

I know but I think this is something that I must remind myself especially when dealing with other people. There is a system that enables such injustices and no matter how hard we want the world to be fair, sometimes it isn’t just fair.

no worries, I am not gonna suck up things such as that. i do not wish for revenge but someone has got to stand up for what is right. I will not be deterred.

The Standards ( Dating Woes).

I’m currently not in a dating scene causing some of my friends and family to start worrying about my “lovelife” especially about my future. Lots have questioned me if I am setting the bar too high or why am I even too choosy?

Oftentimes, I actually find such questions annoying, really annoying. I know that I do not owe anyone an explanation but when everyone seems to bug you with the same question, over and over again, it would really put you in a very awkward situation.  I have my reasons and it may not be acceptable to some but yes, I do have standards.

Standards that other people may not comprehend because how come a FAT lady  like me can still afford to have some. Wow, I didn’t even  knew that standards have become a privilege depending on your body size. Ridiculous but I am not conforming to such foolishness and I would still set standards. I guess the term standards when it comes to dating has a negative connotation and that’s because many have perceived it that way. I may be firm that I have set standards but it doesn’t mean that I have to box myself with such. Remember, change is the only thing in this world, so standards can change, too.

Let’s examine one of the standards that I have set. I want to date a  financially responsible guy. Wait a minute, why did I become a social climber/gold digger in other people’s eyes? I’ve said responsible and does not mean that I need  a really rich guy, just someone who knows how to handle his finances well. My reasons? I have been financially independent even when I was still studying. It taught me to work hard for the things that I want. It is liberating and fulfilling to buy things and travel using the hard earned money. I want to share the same perspective with someone, especially to my future partner, where both of us can be financially independent and have the capacity to build a family ( if we’ll head to that kind of commitment).  I do not want to put the weight of my financial responsibilities to that person and I’m expecting him to do the same. I actually have more explaining to do but I couldn’t care less. Standards may just be my guidelines in terms of finding the right partner but it does mean that it’ll be it. Come on, Mr. Cupid might not be in my radar yet. I don’t know what’s under his sleeves.

Seriously, the standards that I have set may be restricting  my choices but I am not regretting it. Just remember that I’m not closing my door to anyone and it is not yet my priority as of the moment.

So sit back and relax.

 

P.S. Happy 6th anniversary blog.

 

Falling for Mr. Wrong

Love happens even if we could not find a reason for it. There are thing that don’t make sense yet we try to ignore them especially if we are dealing with our feelings. I have been taking a lot of considerations and trying to warn myself not to fall in love again especially if I am not yet ready to but it seems that I am not capable of knowing when I would be ready to fall in love again.

The worst part of it is that I continue on committing the same mistake all over again, by falling to Mr. Wrong. I could not find a single reason to ignore him especially that we are destined  to be near with each other and I befriended him. I am not yet sure if this is wrong but I want to be with him even if I might hurt a lot of people around. I wanted to be selfish and have him for myself but I have to accept that I came on his life the moment that he was so sure that he will be spending the rest of it with another girl.

I don’t want to confuse him but I also wanted him to consider his true feelings. I know that he’s struggling and I am here. desperately waiting for him to choose me over her. I love him and I think, that is the only thing that really matters right now even if I am committing the biggest mistake in my life. I just hope that it will be worth it.

SO WHAT LYRICS-PINK

Na Na Na Na Na Na Na
Na Na Na Na Na Na
Na Na Na Na Na Na Na
Na Na Na Na Na Na

I guess i just lost my husband
I don’t know where he went
So I’m gonna drink my money
I’m not gonna pay his rent (Nope)
I got a brand new attitude
And I’m gonna wear it tonight
I wanna get in trouble
I wanna start a fight

Na Na Na Na Na Na Na
I wanna start a fight
Na Na Na Na Na Na Na
I wanna start a fight

So so what?
I’m still a rock star
I got my rock moves
And I don’t need you
And guess what
I’m having more fun
And now that we’re done
I’m gonna show you tonight
I’m alright, I’m just fine
And you’re a tool
So so what?
I am a rock star
I got my rock moves
And I don’t want you tonight

Uh, check my flow, uh

The waiter just took my table
And gave to Jessica Simp – Shit!
I guess I’ll go sit with drum boy
At least he’ll know how to hit
What if this song’s on the radio
Then somebody’s gonna die
I’m gonna get in trouble
My ex will start a fight

Na Na Na Na Na Na Na
He’s gonna start a fight
Na Na Na Na Na Na Na
We’re all gonna get in a fight!

So so what?
I’m still a rock star
I got my rock moves
And I don’t need you
And guess what
I’m having more fun
And now that we’re done
I’m gonna show you tonight
I’m alright, I’m just fine
And you’re a tool
So so what?
I am a rock star
I got my rock moves
And i don’t want you tonight

You weren’t there
You never were
You want it all
But that’s not fair
I gave you life
I gave my all
You weren’t there
You let me fall

So so what?
I’m still a rock star
I got my rock moves
And I don’t need you
And guess what
I’m having more fun
And now that we’re done (we’re done)
I’m gonna show you tonight
I’m alright(I’m alright),I’m just fine (I’m just fine)
And you’re a tool
So so what?
I am a rock star
I got my rock moves
And I don’t want you tonight

No No, No No
I Don’t want you tonight
You weren’t there
I’m gonna show you tonight
I’m alright, I’m just fine
And you’re a tool
So so what?
I am a rock star
I got my rock moves
And i don’t want you tonight

Ba da da da da da