1. DEATH CAB FOR CUTIE – MEET ME ON THE EQUINOX
2. BAND OF SKULLS – FRIENDS
3. THOM YORKE – HEARING DAMAGE
4. LYKKE LI – POSSIBILITY
5. THE KILLERS – A WHITE DEMON LOVE SONG
6. ANYA MARINA – SATELLITE HEART
7. MUSE – I BELONG TO YOU (NEW MOON REMIX)
8. BON IVER & ST. VINCENT – ROSYLN
9. BLACK REBEL MOTORCYCLE CLUB – DONE ALL WRONG
10. HURRICANE BELLS – MONSTERS
11. SEA WOLF – THE VIOLET HOUR
12. OK GO – SHOOTING THE MOON
13. GRIZZLY BEAR WITH VICTORIA LEGRAND – SLOW LIFE

14. EDITORS – NO SOUND BUT THE WIND
15. ALEXANDRE DESPLAT – NEW MOON (THE MEADOW)

All my life I’ve been searching for something
Something I can put my finger on
Maybe I’ve been living for the weekend
Maybe I’ve been living for this cyber soul
Every Friday just about midnight
All my problems seem to disappear
Everyone that I miss when I’m distant
Everybody’s here

I need love
Cause only love is true
I need every wakin’ hour with you
And my friends cause they’re so beautiful
Yeah my friends they are so beautiful
They’re my friends

All my life I’ve been wastin’, wastin’
Wastin’ all my money, all my time
All the time that I’m waitin’, waitin’
Waitin for the moment you are mine
The song about yeah I’m thinkin’, thinkin’
Thinkin all the things that i’ve done wrong
All the time yeah i was forgettin’
You were mine all along

I need love
Cause only love is true
I need every wakin’ hour with you
And my friends cause they’re so beautiful
Yeah my friends they are so beautiful
They’re my friends

I need love
Cause only love is true
I need every wakin’ hour with you
And my friends cause they’re so beautiful
Yeah my friends they are so beautiful
They’re my friends

They’re my friends…

I was staring at him with no apparent reason. His face seems so perfect that me eyes are glued to it. He never seemed to notice such loving glare but I still continue to gaze while cherishing such wonderful moment.

I couldn’t take staying away from him but I know it is the only way for I know that we are two worlds apart.

He’s everything to me as well as to other women, much better compared to me, but I’m still hoping that he could lend me some love and I am willing to pay the price for it. His affection and love means a lot to me and just right enough to keep me surviving into this cruel world.

My love for him caused me a lot of pain but what can I do if my heart still desire for him. My heart will never get tired of waiting for him, it may die along the way but I know it will always find a reason to reset everything and to resurface with so much love stored for him…

My first love

They say that “first love never dies” for it will always take a part on yourself that you can never let go nor forget. I really don’t know if I will still continue to believe on it especially that I had experience a lot of sufferings because of love, My first experience on love is not actually the greatest thing that ever happened to me but it was my first experience on pain that almost tear my heart and took my life away(figuratively).

He was the first guy that I had a crush on during my freshman years. He was a bit shy and silent that I got interested on him. And then, some unexpected twist had happened when our teacher assigned me and him to be on the same group. I was very nervous at that time especially when I approached him to ask for his number so that I can contact him about our report. He was very serious at that time that he never noticed that I was shaking and trembling, maybe because I was too overwhelmed of the fact that I could have a chance to know him a little bit.

The report did not turned quite good for I wasn’t able to help him but he never complained about it and somewhat considered the fact that I was still a new student and I was still preoccupied of adjusting to my new environment and life.

But it wasn’t me after all that needs adjusting but the thing inside my heart that couldn’t slow down its beat whenever he was around.

And then, I learned from a friend that he has a girlfriend and the two of them are so in love together that nobody can ever break them apart. I was a bit hurt but that never ceased me from falling madly in love with him. It was so intoxicating that my thoughts and dreams were all about him.

Until, one of my friends told him about my existence and my feelings about him. And because of that he became so aloof and we never had a chance to talk.

And right now… moving on is the best thing that ever happened to me…

1. STUDY

2. PRACTICE SOCCER, JOGGING EVERY DAY( at least 30 minutes)

3. UPDATE BLOG

4. READ BOOKS

5. DOWNLOAD MUSICS

6. DO THE LAUNDRY

7. DRINK 2 LITERS OF WATER A DAY

8. HAVE FUN WITH MY FRIENDS

9. PRAY

10. SLEEP 8 HOURS EVERY DAY

I am insecure. I guess it will always be a human nature. I really don’t know why or how to deal with it,It’s just I really can’t help not to pity myself and be affected because of it. Academic performance, friends, looks and even boys causes my insecurities and because of it, I always have low self-esteem.

I’m so jealous for those people who treated their insecurities as a challenge and later on, succeeded in making themselves happy. But on my case, I’m always living on the shadows of my insecurities and thus, controlling my emotions that leads to more heartaches and sufferings. I always wanted to step-out and prove that I can be what I want and be happy living contented with what I have.

I do believe that the only key for me to surpass this predicament is to accept my weaknesses and limitations. And use it in evaluating the “real me.” I should be happy for what I am and what I have. For in the end, the only thing that would matter is how would I define “myself” that will affect on how will I pursue my dreams and in dealing with the challenges and trials that lies ahead. And I only have myself to depend and cling on.